Wednesday, April 14, 2010

Babies Like Cat Food

Since my daughter became mobile, the cat has spent very little time in open spaces.  And once she began to walk every cabinet and container was fair game too.  She is not shy about it either.  She'll look you dead in the eye as you shout "Berlin, stay out of the cabinet!"  Not everything is baby proofed because I'm a bad father.  Chemicals are locked up...do not call Child Protective Services on me! Her favorite unguarded item is the cat food container.

Jack, my cat has a little place in the nook of the dining room with his food and water.  Next to it is a container with a flip lid that holds 20 pounds of cat food.  Before you say it, I know I should put it in the garage or somewhere else locked up so she cannot get to it.  To that, I say screw off, this is about the day to day crap.  If I had to walk to another room or unlock his food every time I went to feed him.......let's just say I'm a bad pet parent too and leave it at that, OK? 

She loves to get into his food.  She loves dropping it into his water.  She loves, loves, loves eating the crap!  I have the philosophy that it's not going to kill her...redeeming my self here...after all it is organic cat food!  If I make a big deal out of it, she'll only want to do it more.  Yeah, so my wife doesn't see things my way.  She FREAKS OUT!  Cheeks are squeezed, fingers dug around, lots of yelling...you'd think it was a string of pearls or something going down our child's gullet!

This morning was no different than any other, Berlin watched me fill up his water from the dispenser.  See I just redeemed myself again...he drinks the same bottled/filtered water from the thingy that we do! She then watched avidly as I scooped some food into his bowl.  As I walked off, she reached over and grabbed a piece of cat food and shoved it in her mouth.  I ignored it.  It's the best way. If I don't yell or pay any attention, she won't associate it with a positive reaction.  In theory, she'll not do it again!

Nah Uh!

Wife: WHAT DID SHE JUST PUT IN HER MOUTH?
Me:  What do you think, she's at the cat's food?
Wife: TAKE IT OUT OF HER MOUTH!!!
Me: Why, it's just cat food?
Wife: BECAUSE I DON'T WANT HER EATING CAT FOOD!
Me: Fine.  Wow she's got some serious strength in these jaws!
Wife: Should have stopped her before she did it.
Me. Thanks, Come on Berlin, open up.
Wife: Squeeze her cheeks, she'll open up.

(Seriously?  So gross, half of it was gone anyway.)

Wife: I can never trust her with you!
Me: Don't be so dramatic. (walking off to wash my hand)
Wife: I'm gonna come home and half the food will be gone!
Me: Seriously?
Wife: I don't know, you can't even keep an eye on her when you're standing right next to her.
Me: Not having this arguement.

Just wait till she finds the litter box!  That's gonna be AWESOME!  

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