Tuesday, December 15, 2009

Christmas Shopping in Your Own Closet

I had to attend a training in Houston yesterday so I stayed with my parents for a couple days. Last night I was hanging out with my mom while she wrapped Christmas presents. OK, so my mom could never be labeled a superior gift giver. My daughter's birth was the exception. We totally got hooked up with an awesome stroller and car seat. Still continues to give awesome stuff to her granddaughter. I'm pretty sure that's Grandma's job, so it is the exception, not the rule.

My middle sister is perfect for Mom's gift giving. She loves the random stuff in life. So getting a purse stuffed with body wash and shower puff thingies is AOK. I'm not saying I don't like what she gives, it just always makes me pause for a moment as I assess how or why she chose the particular item that had my name on the tag.

So this year, my dad had less than subtly been hinting that he wanted a mini fridge for his office. Mom found the perfect gift, a mini Coca Cola fridge from Sears. She envisioned a floor safe sized unit would arrive at the house and she'd get it wrapped up and Dad would be elated. Now, my mother is one of those people who is fully capable of using the Internet and does, but doesn't always note the details or options associated with sites she doesn't frequent. Her first Internet purchase that was not a book was delivered and what to her wandering eye should appear, but an elf fridge that could hold a max of 6 beers. This thing is cute, really. But I felt so bad for her, I'm sure dad will love it as he actually is not allowed to have a fridge in his office per Fire Marshall rules, but come on. So she wrapped it and laughed the whole time. I just hope Dad doesn't have that glimmer of disappointment as he opens it that will destroy any chance of its success.

We continued talking about horrible gifts she was giving others and we were making fun of a gift my Grandfather had recently given her. She mentioned getting underwear and undershirts to Grandpa. My little eleven-year-old sister said "EWW, why are you giving him underwear for Christmas?" Mom explained that it's something he won't buy himself, so she gives it for Christmas. Then Mom explained that Dad had recently opened his drawer and exclaimed, "I'm out of undershirts!" She told him I just did the whites. To which he comments, I guess I do have an unopened pack of them that you gave me last Christmas. WTF, Dad? Don't tell someone, I've never used your gift, even if it was friggin' underwear! So Mom told me that she will just start shopping for his Christmas presents in his own closet. Dad will receive the same packages of socks, under ware and undershirts he did last year. I can't wait for it! Imagine receiving the exact same set of underwear for Christmas every year. How long could it last? I'm betting two or three Christmases at least!

May Santa take pity on your lump of coal!

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